Neighbors

Did I mention that my neighbor recently took his own life?  In his house?  Which physically shares a wall with mine....

 

I saw him that day. 

 

It registered with me that he seemed pre-occupied.  He was clearly agitated but met my eyes with a greeting.  That he would take his life that evening - despite my own experience - never entered my mind.

 

Frances and I were at work by the time he was "found", so we missed the cops, the detectives, the mortuary truck.  And our neighbors were too uncomfortable to tell us what happened.  So my first clue that there was pain next door was that my neighbor's grown children were around.  All of them.  A couple of times over the course of the week.  Having just been through my mother's death, I had a strange sense of deja vu.

 

So I asked the family if everything was okay.  

 

And the oldest son handed me a box - a mortuary box of ashes - and said.  "No, everything is not okay.  Here is all that is left of my dad.  He took his own life."

 

Just like that.

 

I appreciated the directness.  But shit.  Molly did not take her life in our home - but my neighbor's death brought Molly's death home.  Literally.

 

If I start talking about moving, you'll know one of the reasons.