Following the Heart

One can over do thinking things through.

Ponder the possibility of this.  Consider the possibility of that.  Add up the costs and calculate the infinite ways those costs might change.  Spend a lot of time reflecting.

There will always be risks to anything.  And among the many, many things that Molly taught me was that all of the thoughtful calculations in the world can miss - probably WILL miss - the real problems that are going to emerge.  Thoughtful calculation is going to lead you to the same place every time: the anticipated action might go well, and then again, it might not.  

Frances and I are gut instinct people.  We will think things through to some extent, but our hearts are going to overrule our head almost every time.  So when we moved to this 55 Plus Community, we could have spent a weekend here to see if we really liked "the lifestyle".  But that seemed like setting ourselves up for a weekend of intense marketing.  Instead, we had lunch at the bar a few times so that we could talk with the bartenders and the folks at the bar; seemed more "real" to us.  And we felt at home pretty quickly.

We did not spend a lot of time in the desert in the summer before we moved - we just figured that it would be hot.  We had heard that it was a "dry" heat - much different than the East Coast humidity that we were used to. Basically, we chalked up heat waves to a universal truth that there is no perfect place on the planet and we would rather pay our dues with heat than with snow.  So far so good on that.

Of course, we did some rough financial calculations before the move; add the cost of the mortgage; throw some money in for Homeowners Association. pay off the cars before we moved.  After that, our sense was that the budget would all more or less even out.  A tad bit naive.  

Our first bumps in the road came with  utility bills. Mercy me.  We did not spend a lot of time researching those.  Correct that.  We spent no time researching them.  Which became obvious when I opened the first electric bill.  A little research might have been helpful in this area - we weren't even here for half the month and the bill was more than I had ever paid for any utility.  And then there was the cost of the service call to fix the air conditioner that went out somewhere between three teen aged boys in and out while we were moving in and the contractor leaving every door in the house open.  

We had signed a contract on the house before we became aware that we would need to pay for things like landscaping ($145 a month) and extermination ($50 a month) that are not regular expenses anywhere else we have lived and had not even occurred to us.  We also didn't factor in additional insurance costs - including insurance on the golf cart which is a new vehicle that we are going to have to take care of.   

I am not giving up having a cleaning lady.  So there is that, too.

The overwhelming gut instinct was to move.  Have there been surprises along the way?  Yes.  Might it have been prudent to do a bit more research?  Perhaps.   Do I have any regrets?  No.

Trusting in Multiplication

I am at that point – financially and personally – where I have to trust that multiplication is true.

I am believing that life lived on a budget can be richer and more satisfying than life lived with a regular and exceedingly ample pay check.

I am figuring that I might even lose a few pounds if I eat out less than I used to and reacquaint myself with my collection of pots and pans.

I am finding that interacting with a wide variety of people in a series of jobs is infinitely more satisfying than talking to the same people everyday over a cubicle wall.

I am discovering the wealth that is resale shops and consignment stores.  And I am finding that they are very crowded these days.

Don’t get me wrong:  there are things I miss about having plenty of money – things like having a Starbucks latte everyday, or not thinking twice about buying theater tickets, or having my hair professionally colored.   And I miss that I am not paying for college, or a wedding or grandmotherly things.

I never wanted money just to have it.  I want to live with less.  I know that my life will be richer as a result.  But I am stepping out here with a bit of faith that Effort multiplied by Passion =  Life.

A Brief Look at Reality

Let's see.

My undergraduate degree is in business, so I know

a litle bit about income and expense.

I was willing to substitute teach yesterday and today, but I didn't get jobs. While I have filled the time with my lengthy to-do list and I am happy to have had the time off, I also have to admit the fact that substitute teaching is, almost by definition, not going to be a dependable source of income.

And I just found out that my consulting gig is going to pay HALF of what I had hoped that it would pay. Hmmm. I am NOT loving the work, but I don't think that I should just walk away from it out of some misplaced pride either. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush; or something like that.

So, the income side of the ledger is increasingly uncertain, while the expense side of the ledger is not. In theory, we should be saving money. That is not quite how it is playing out.

Frances' birthday celebrations are costing between $3,000 and $4,000 (closer to $4,000). We are having a ball. A lot of fun. But turning 50 is not cheap!

And I just put down a $500 deposit on a school trip to France that I am taking this summer. I am looking forward to it, and couldn't take the trip if I had a full time job. So, it is a GIFT to be able to take this trip. But, again, it is has already cost money and is going to cost quite a bit more.

We have enjoyed the last couple of months; I had stayed at my job too long and it feels really good to be free of the constraints that full time professional responsibilty brings.

Since quitting my job, I have indulged in the dream that I will never again have to deal with an HR department and a full time job. Today, that seems like a fantasy. Reality is going to crash in on us very soon and we need to find some discipline in the financial aspects of our new life!

Starbucks

I have two coffee makers, a cappacino maker, and a daily Starbucks Habit. Today, as I ordered my daily Grande Skinny Cinnamon Dolce Latte for just over $4 I began to understand some of the more nuanced repercussions of my pending unemployment.

I can't do this anymore.

I can no longer afford a daily latte.

I need to start brewing my own.

But it is such a comforting habit... even a bit healthy if we talk about all of the milk that is in those lattes. Perhaps I should cut myself a break?

I really don't want to give up my lattes. And Eric, my barrista, he's going to notice if I stop dropping by. I know he will. In fact, if I stop going to my local Starbucks, I think that the store's sales figures will show a measurable decline. (My waistline may show a measurable decline as well since I won't be picking up those deceptively caloric mini vanilla scones).

But you know, I have to make some changes, and lattes are going to be the first thing to go. It's a savings of between $75 and $100 a month. I sipped today's latte slowly. I knew.

And no, I have not told my mother yet about my unemployment. I have to figure out how to make lattes at home first. Then maybe I will tell her.