Tears

The tears flow now - unbidden and unexpected.  

Two years after Molly's death, tears might be triggered by be a song on the radio, the white noise while driving, or a half forgotten memory that skips across my mind and is quickly lost again.  Tears might be triggered by anything or nothing at all.  

Today, it was an Amy Grant song that I popped into the car CD player because I just couldn't listen to NPR fund raising any longer.  That song - at that moment -  opened my heart to how devestated I am by Molly's death.  I lost myself in the tender lyrics - "Somewhere down the road, there'll be answers to the quetions..." - and just let the tears flow;  then, for SOME reason that I don't really understand, I kept pushing the repeat button on my CD player.  Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. 

Until the tears didn't flow anymore.